Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
