I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Randomize
