she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
accomplished twins. life is a go
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize
