I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize
