Non-Jews are for practice
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
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