I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Randomize