I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
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