Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Randomize