I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
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