Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
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