The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
jump out the window naked night went bad
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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