I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
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