was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
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