oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
Randomize
