We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize