I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
