Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
Dick very happy bro
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
