This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Randomize
