so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
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