you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
wat bout pragnant strippers??
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
Randomize