I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
