yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
Randomize
