handjob tips. give me some.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
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