you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Randomize
