Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
Who put my cat in the fridge?
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