So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
Randomize
