coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
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