Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
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and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
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As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I just gargled with NyQuil
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
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