So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize