i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize