k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
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