they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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