If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Holy sore nipples Batman
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
