I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize