Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
Randomize