We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Randomize
