If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
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