You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
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