You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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