i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So many bounce houses so little time
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
i need to put some appletini on your dick
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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