I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Randomize
