Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
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she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
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In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
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