It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
