Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
