hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
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