i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
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Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
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KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
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