Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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