A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
Randomize
