I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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