Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
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