She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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